8-6-2011

It will be tedious after today because I will be going to challenge with other promoter in the it fair to ensure that the commission hit my target fir this it show, or else I will quit. I don't know what am i going to do tomorrow? I am very confused. In the morning, I asked myself one question. Who am I? Why must I suffer in this world? What should I do to ensure that I am perfect? I really want to know the answer but I guess nothing came into my mind. I wondered who is willing to help me out? My god bro or my big bro? Or should I talk to my parents instead. There is too much things in my heart. I feel like shouting out but I just do not have the courage to tell them. Well, I want to tell them that I am stressed in polytechnic, but what could they do? They will just tell me to relax. I do not want the answer, but instead I want the solution. Oh gosh, I wondered how am I going to live such a sinister world if I dont use any under table method such as curse. However, i still have people to discuss about my problem. They can say but they cannot help me in anything. They are just my imaginary, I guess. I believe that they exists in this world but on the other hand, I am jus myself. What can I do? How am I going to continue living? Even there is prophecy about my death but I just make myself more happy? Why? I am just acting that I am okay and looking strong at the outside but in the inner part of me, I am just an weak boy who does not have any instructions or path to walk. I am sitting at the corner last night and facing to the wall. Looking at my hands, my tear starting to roll down my cheeks. If I don't let go the burden in my minds, I am just going to face the black man prophecy.